MKMMA–Week 21

Miracles.. like most people I know, I thought that most of the  miracles either took place 2000 years ago, or happened to other people I did not know….I can’t say that anymore. With a shift in perception now, it’s astonishingly easy to conclude, I can see miracles at almost any given moment. Huge miracles that when I think about it, takes my breath away…Like this living planet spinning on and on…Or simple personal miracles like listening to my wife’s rhythmic breathing at night when she’s sleeping and being so thankful for her breath and her life behind that breath. Once this train of thought is started, I begin to see layers and years of miracles that have happened. How did a young guy from Western Nevada meet this incredible woman from Duluth Minnesota???—-A miracle of amazing degree brought us together.

How is it that I would happen to come into the universe of Mark and Davene, when there’s 7 billion other people who I could have crossed paths with first?—

On  the week of the hero’s journey, I had quite a week. It was a real roller coaster emotionally. The questions of “What am I pretending not to know,” and “what would the person you intend to become do next” haunted me…I didn’t know if I was ready to answer the call, to give my self permission to become my best self……fast forward to That Thursday afternoon. I go to this home to install window coverings just like I do everyday and have done for 20 years. I meet the lady of the house( Leslie) who is excited for the new coverings. She is talking to me as I set into getting the job done. For the sake of conversation, I ask her what she does for a living. She says, “I’m a director for a children’s cancer foundation here locally”…I stopped what I was doing and looked at her in wonder and some disbelief. One of my smart goals  from the very beginning has been either create or become involved with a charitable foundation that benefited children….Leslie told me her story and how she got involved. her daughter had contracted cancer at 17. Of course it rocked her world and took as much courage to get through the nightmare as she could muster. Her daughter is now enjoying a complete remission, but Leslie decided then and there, that she would devote her time and talents to the foundation that helped her so much when  she needed it the most.

I knew right then in my heart, I had found my charity and a miracle. I have been going into people’s homes for 20 years. Never had I met a person who was an integral part of a charity. It was clear to me that I needed to get involved with this wonderful foundation. She mentioned that their financing and operation was completely financed by generous private and public groups. She also stated that the foundation had just moved into a new office complex and needed window coverings…Would I have any extras that maybe would  fit?—–Well, I first approached my sales person Sabrina, who enthusiastically agreed to help (masterminding), and together we approached our company with a proposal for them to fund and make the blinds for Leslie’s office. Both Sabrina and I agreed (of course!!) to forego our compensation to allow this gift to happen. Our Company agreed with great enthusiasm! (more masterminding!——-at least 8 people are involved with this now)

This is the first time I’ve ever done this kind of thing…This feeling that I have right now…is so wonderful…I’ve allowed my light to shine and that gives others permission for theirs to shine as well….It is so magical!—-yes, I believe in miracles!

MKMMA—week 18 —-2/6/15

Once again, Mark and Davene disperse the fog in front of my eyes….and because of it, I SEE that I and most others I know, live with happiness always receding into the sunset just before we can reach it. So many years of being embarrassed and regretting past mistakes, then switching to being fearful of what the future will bring….Rarely being grateful for what my life is bringing to me in the moment.

Lately though, I’ve been concentrating during my sit/meditation on forgiveness and gratitude and I’m doing it first thing in the morning. No ibuprofen could ever make me feel so wonderful as my meditations. First, giving myself permission to be happy now. Next, To forgive my self for sins I’ve committed either knowingly or unknowingly upon myself and others. After that, sending loving kindness to myself, others close to me and finally to all sentient beings…The feeling of joy and peace that I gain after I’ve finished almost makes me feel guilty…Getting so much for such a small price to pay in just sitting.

My PPN’s are coming alive…One of my favorites is either creating or becoming involved with a children’s charity…..Right after I committed during Hero’s journey week, I quite unexpectedly met a director for a children’s cancer foundation. This last Tuesday, I went to their facility and spent an hour with 2 of the directors who were really excited to see me. they are a non  profit and all the funding is from local business and individuals…..They moved into a new beautiful office and need window coverings…I do window coverings. I’m collaborating with the manufacturer I work for to supply this foundation with new window shades….It’s only the beginning! I can’t believe how excited I am….Wish me luck!

Week 18—-The Hero’s Journey—-What a week!

I have not missed a webinar since day 1. Not that has taken any kind of real effort as I have relished each and everyone. It’s when a repetitive task becomes tedious and then moves into the realm of boring that sticking with a task month after month, can take on what seems heroic efforts. the webinars are and have always been engaging to say the least. Listening to Mark can often times be like sticking a fork in a light socket and enjoying the shocking jolt in the process. Davene’s no nonsense delivery is honest and refreshing. As my mid west Nebraska friend would say, “she can tell you how the hog ate the cabbage!” What that means is , Davene has the ability to get right to the  heart of the matter without sugar coating it. Because of Mark and Davene’s honesty, I trust them and listen with my heart as they give us their instructions and awesome content. It was because of my respect for Mark, Davene, and Trish that this last webinar has had without a doubt the most profound effect on me this past week.

During the webinar Davene stated, ” Decide….are you going to take that first step out into your Hero’s Journey?” That statement haunted me. Next Mark says, ” be honest with yourself. If your just going through the motions and not doing the work, be HONEST!….hold your head up and walk away. Stop fooling yourself.” That got my attention. I felt like both Davene and Mark were speaking directly to me as if they had put a surveillance camera somewhere in my house and had been watching me. The icing on the cake was when  Jason talked about honesty and how as a matter of course, he would lie to himself all the time…..After the webinar, these comments kept getting louder and louder in my head and heart….I kept asking the question of myself. “Are you going to quit something else yet again??…Turn tail when the crises arises and slink away?”…I kept hearing: “HONESTY…lying….integrity….persisitence…You have to make a decision…”

I was in an emotional and spiritual panic. Suddenly, the veil lifted, the fog vaporized, and I saw my life as having been one big lie that I had been telling myself for decades. Never really examining the BS I incessantly told myself. I had always been a people pleaser at the expense of my own inner feelings and dreams and had lived with regret and resignation about my inability to be powerful enough to say NO!  As Mark had stated, “if you don’t decide to step into your journey, your authentic self, all you’ll ever be is a copy of a copy of a copy of someone else.

At that point in my internal conversations and panic, I wondered if I was going to have to trade in my marriage, my whole life and take a radical new path, leaving a path of destruction for those I loved most to deal with….Last Sunday night was a “Dark night of the Soul” kind of night. I laid awake all night with Mark and Davene and Jason’s voices in a taped loop running over and over in my head. “Decide….Honesty…I’m a habitual liar…who is that man in the mirror really?…Do you want to be a copy of a copy?”….Also Mark had said, ” a lot of people create distractions just large enough for them to make excuses why they can’t move forward…Boy has that ever been me!

After what seemed forever, I did sleep a little. When I awoke, I knew that my heart had made a decision. I am not walking away. I AM going to find my bliss! I AM starting out on my hero’s journey and I don’t have to crush anyone else in the process especially my family. It’s not their fault I’ve habitually given away my personal power…I have to face it, I’ve given away my power because I felt It absolved me of the responsibility of taking control of my own life. It’s been a cope out of mine for decades. Nobody else should suffer for my indecision, least of all those who’ve loved me the most.

.—This week for the first time, some miraculous events  have happened. I believe the universe saw my true heart and that I made a DECISION and is responding in ways that are leaving me in awe…I am so grateful. Avenues, previously unknown to me have materialized this week and are moving me to the realization of my DMP and PPN’s of recognition for creative expression and Liberty. Mark had said  early on, ” somewhere between weeks 12 and 18, the light bulb goes off…My light is beginning to shine!—-





Week 17—-side trip

Well It’s been quite a week!—-My wife and I have been out of town for the week and it wasn’t a vacation…although it was great to be away from home…we were gone just long enough to be grateful for getting to sleep in my own bed again….This gratitude is easier to come by when you’re staying in a 1 bedroom apartment with 4 people and sleeping on an inflatable mattress that loses air as the night progresses.—-Anyway, my routine was upended pretty much the whole week, so I’m writing about what happened during that time.

My wife and I had gone to support my youngest son in a wrongful termination mediation. He is 24 and had just started his career with an advertising and marketing agency. He was so excited that he was working in his field of study and was actually hired by a friend who he had gone to college with. It seemed like a dream come true. He realized right away that the job was going to demand a significant amount of energy and time to be successful, but he was more than up to the task….At least he thought so…Long story short…The firm he worked for thought he was not up to the task and terminated him after only 2 months….After working 60 hour weeks and volunteering to do whatever was needed, the termination caught him completely by surprise….It’s hard to watch a young man flush with unbridled enthusiasm and excitement get to learn about the harsher side of business so soon in his career….Also, not having ever been fired, or going through the channels of the EEOC (equal employment opportunity commission), none of us had any idea how the process would play out. The initial meeting between my son’s former employer, us and the mediator was difficult and awkward…there was no agreement between the parties, and in all likelihood, will be shelved in the vast back log of cases that have been on hold for years waiting to be heard by the EEOC.

The upside of this experience is that it he’s getting to see what he’s made of and pick himself up off the mat and press on….I’ve often heard what must be a cliche by now that,  “God doesn’t close one door without opening another.” Of course that sentiment is more appreciated with the advantage of time and finally seeing that indeed, there is another door that’s opened. One just has to trust the universe that the laws it operates with, are working just as they always do. Easy for me to look ahead, not so easy for our young son who’s just getting started in his life….this past week though, would have been so much harder to bear pre-MKMMA, but I am amazed how easily I’ve leaned into what I’ve learned and now trust to happen going forward. As a man once said who I admired, “it’s easier to be calm when you know the final score of the game before it’s started.”

One of the biggest takeaways from this past week was that my wife and I rallied to our son’s side to give him love and support, and no matter what the outcome, we’d always be there for him and love him. Without a doubt, he knows that. We are family!


Week 16—-Kindness—-is Everywhere!

In Doing this exercise of bestowing Kindness without being detected was not that easy, but I got it done. I was in a quandary at first, then I began to focus on the moments of my day when they were happening, and suddenly I found there were unlimited possibilities for RAKs. Going through the fast food drive through, I paid for the person behind me. I never saw them and they never saw me. I have no idea how they reacted when learning of their benefit, but I do know how the young lady at the cashier window lit up when I told her what I wanted to do….That was an unintended blessing and more than enough reward for my RAK. Her eyes twinkled as she looked at me and said, “How awesome are you for doing that!” We both smiled and I felt like I was the one who got the better end of the deal. That event flavored the rest of my day, and like many in the alliances noted, suddenly I was seeing how many kindness were being given! It was constant. At that point in my focus, I though, “Wow! the world has changed right before my very eyes…So many laws in play were going through my mind. The law of substitution: focusing on kindness, courtesy, respect even love instead of being frustrated at the traffic or the person who cut me off. Then of course was the law of compensation—give more-get more….Wow…. Watching my wife who lives her entire day giving unconciously–everyday! I have loved her for years for her open and wonderful heart, but now I’m so much more in awe of her….

Finally, I have a sense of ease and open friendliness towards others this week. I’ve been traveling and in doing so, entering into conversations with people. Drawing them out and really listening to them. I’m honored by their trust and how easily they respond to my attention…And it’s all been so easy! No agendas, no ulterior motives, just genuine respect and real interest in who they are…I feel this wonderful freedom in my spirit…What an Awesome Week!!


MKMMA—-week 15—Self Control

This week with the Franklin Make Over has been interesting. I’ve prioritized the categories and have been diligent about observing myself and others with my number one —-self control. I really liked Trish’s definition of the difference between self control and discipline. Self control is not doing what you know you shouldn’t and discipline is doing what you know you should.

Some people are driven to coach themselves successfully and others do much better when someone is pushing them. I’ve excelled in many areas when pushed by an outside force. This is one of the main reasons I love this course. I have a virtual coach or coaches that lay out a course of action in which I’m to follow.  It seems, at least in my case, I have to have a series of goals or carrots that I hang out in front of my mind’s eye to keep me on the straight and narrow (law of substitution).  My biggest goal for many years was my annual back pack packing trip that lasted  from one to two weeks. The severity of the trip required a high degree of physical preparation, so my regimen was weight training and running for 8 months of the year. I watched my diet, studied maps, walked  the hills behind my house with a pack full of weights and dreamed daily of the first week in September. That was usually the time of my trips. Also, I had a 2 very good friends who were preparing as well to pack with me, so it was the buddy system as far as training was concerned. I didn’t want to be out of shape while they were fit and sailing past me on the trails.

I haven’t done a major trip in 15 years. As for my two friends, one is  gone,  and the other died in a tragic accident so slowly,I’ve slipped in recent years into some bad habits. That’s why I’ve chosen self control as my number 1, and it’s also a huge reason I’ve been in MKMMA. The last several years have been particularly hard. I know, it’s circumstances that I created….. Let me just say that, I was NOT thinking of my future self way back when I had a chance to leave a brighter legacy for the person who’s writing this post. I’m older and the hope and audacity of youth headed south about 7 years ago, and I kind of gave up on myself.  Gave up on my dreams. This course recently, and meditation for the last 5 years (sporadic) has been my medicine. I thank God for both. My wife who’s suffered through this whole time as well, was feeling a lot the same way, and is keenly interested on how I come out of this experience. We both feel there’s a lot on the line here and I’m damned sure going to finish this course strong. I owe it to her, but I mostly owe it to myself. It’s been a long time since I dared to dream without cynicism.  It’s time to dream with joy now…It’s time to do it now…After all the man said, you’re whole, perfect, strong, powerful, loving, harmonious and happy! I’m acting on that in faith and I pray for faith daily.

MKMMA week 14 —–some parting thoughts about persistence

As we leave the chapter on persistence, I’m reminded of a time when I was back packing and lived a day of persistence! I had done many hundreds of miles of multi-day hiking. In 1980 2 friends and I hiked 1600 miles of the Pacific Crest Trail.  At no time during that hike did I encounter a day of hiking as arduous as this one day. This particular day defined persistence to the extreme.IMG_0062

7:00 am came quickly. I awoke filled with the same gnawing feeling of anticipation and anxiety that I always had just before a significant physical challenge.  after a quick breakfast of coffee, bagels and peanut butter, we broke camp at 8:00 am.  We began immediately to climb up granite slabs interspersed with grassy areas that lined the creek we were beside. Within 10 minutes I was in full sweat mode. With every step up, the air grew thinner, the full packs got heavier.  By 9:00 am, we had only traveled about a mile. Our reward for reaching a plateau of 11,000 foot level, was the stark view of the next half mile of 2 story, house sized granite blocks that looked as if God had been throwing dice and these monstrous size boulders landed where they were tossed. Beyond them,  was the cirque of University Pass and the Sierra Crest towering 1500′ above. At the site before us, my brother, Shane uttered, “You do this every year for fun??? What’s wrong  with finding a tropical beach with some cold beer for vacation????” At that moment I couldn’t argue. Just standing without moving, we were panting. We took off the packs to rest and refuel with trail mix and gatorade. I knew it wouldn’t matter what, or how much we ate, it wouldn’t be nearly enough. The sight of what we had to negotiate was supremely intimidating. I could see that the next half mile would be an ordeal of trying to balance on uneven rock slabs, some covered with snow and somehow avoiding falling and breaking a leg, an arm or worse. If we made it to the other side of the field, our reward was a 1500′ climb up loose scree at a 45 degree slope to the top of the pass. The upside at least, was that I knew Where we were. The day before the soaring granite columns and cliffs seemed like a cathedral of hallowed ground, now today the scene before us seemed like the devil’s living room. We put our packs on and instead of turning back, for some reason, we decided to move forward toward our goal, University Pass. The talus field of a half mile took 2 hours for us to negotiate. Between carrying a 60 lb. pack, walking on uneven and sometimes moving surfaces, gusty winds threatening to topple us and the altitude, we were gasping with every step.( It must be said that both of us were in great shape. I had been running all spring and summer to prepare for this event.)

When we finally approached the final ascent and looked up at the 1500′ of scree, I wondered aloud. Should we go on. I was running on way past empty. I was beat… whipped… done….way done… and so was my brother Shane. We took off the packs again and laid back against them. I said,” Bro, I’m sorry for doing this to you, if you want to quit and go back, I totally understand.” “Shit,” he said, and kept panting. I spoke again, “we have a choice, get up this friggen slope or redo the friggen rock pile again. If we do, we’ll lose 2 days, or just quit the whole damn thing and go drink beer down on the river for the next week.” He looked at me and breathed out, “You’re a freaking sadist, let’s go uphill, I don’t want any part of that freaking rock pile ever again!

With that, we wearily stood up, and put on our packs and set out one unbalanced foot after the other. Our steps were 2 and 3 inches apart with 20 and 30 seconds between each. As I would plant one foot into the scree, it would slide backwards. Because of that and the degree of the slope, we were forced to bend at the waist and half crawl up with our hands as well. Every 3 or 4 steps would be cause for a rest of 3 or 4 minutes. I refused to look up and have the enormity of the climb, sap any remaining will that I had left. In fact, I didn’t know what I had. I was numb. The physical effort required, kept us from having any kind of thought that we’d make it. Every step was a decision to do or not. At any moment our wills could have come unraveled and we’d succumb to defeat. I sent my mind into a non–thinking place out of pure survival. Slowly, slowly…one inch, two inches…a foot we kept moving imperceptibly. At one point we were about 500′ up the slope and a gust of wind caught my brother’s baseball cap he was wearing and blew it down below him 50′. We both looked down.   “I’m…not….going….to….get…it…” We both turned back around and continued.  Time had warped and I had no sense of how long we’d been on the slope, so I looked at my watch. It was now 2:00 pm. I hadn’t dared to look up in over an hour, but I couldn’t help it at this point, I had to know how much climb was left. For the first time all day, I had the imperceptible inkling we just might make it. The slope began to ease in its angle. Steps got easier. I could hear the wind blowing on the crest. We had 100′ left and I knew we’d make it. 30 minutes later we stood on top of University Pass some 12,500+ feet. We’d been walking since 7 am and it was now 2:30. In 7 and half hours we’d walked 2 miles of the toughest terrain one could imagine. The feeling at the top was one of immense relief, and gratitude.  We took off the packs and enjoyed the tremendous vista of the High Sierra stretched out  60 mile to the south.We high fived each other. Shane shouted, “I don’t EVER want to do anything like that again!!” Pride would set in later. Right now ahead of us,  was a mile down hill of ankle deep scree. It would be our reward for all the uphill.  We would make it to the bottom in 30 minutes. On the way down I spotted a meadow with a winding creek and a wonderful flat camp site. We made it down, set up camp and enjoyed the immense satisfaction that we didn’t have to move much for the rest of the day. We sat and looked back up the incredible slope we’d just come cropped-IMG_0097-e1416842645507.jpgdown. Shane uttered several times, “I can’t believe we just did that!”

We didn’t know it, but we’d just accomplished the 4 steps to success,  Thought, burning desire, plan of action, and attainment of goal.

MkMMA- week 13—–saying good bye to the river of dreams

The end is nigh!—of 2014 that is…and of some old habits and archaic ways of behaving in the world….It’s been only since the beginning of October, but so much has changed…. my oh my! I hadn’t taken on something so significant and life altering as MKMMA since my wife and I decided to have our first child. I’ve changed jobs and careers a couple of times, but nothing, save doing meditation, has affected me personally like this course has. To devote and invest a lot of time weekly to personal growth, having someone who doesn’t even know me, to help me discover my Personal Pivotal Needs and then work weekly on ways to seeing them more clearly, is mind blowing.

Realizing for the first time in a pretty long life, that compensation is what one gets from giving from the HEART…Bringing passion, love to each moment in the service to others…That’s how people get rich in all the ways a person can be rich. “Give More–Get More.”

I’m on a mission to get out of the river of dreams—Like Rudy did…To follow the muse of my dreams is the key. Then…Then, I will be of more value to the world.—–My wife and I watched this movie on Christmas day…what a present! you can bet there wasn’t a dry eye in the audience!—–watch the trailer below…It’ll make your blood run faster and your heart sing!—–May the coming new year really, really, be your best year ever!

MKMMA—week 12 admissions of guilt

“The Tyranny of the urgent.” I first heard this phrase used by a very successful  MLM er. He was referring to of course, how people let the matters of day to day diffuse their focus to a large degree, thereby stopping their progress toward a powerful larger goal and keeping it from happening.

This last month has been challenging indeed! My business was crushed during the recession, but now has been gaining momentum, so much so, that I’ve had little time for much else. I work with interior designers who among other things sell window coverings and that’s where I come in. It’s a very stressful business because the finished product has to look and work with a high degree of precision and quality. Picture being married to 15 to 20 wives or husbands a week  and you are working on their pet project . The holidays are  especially trying. To the emotional customer, it’s not window coverings, but life saving organ transplants  in just the nick of time!

To add to that, All the family is now home for the holidays, my office has become a bedroom. Everyone wanting me to go here, go there, “let’s do  this, let’s do that,” I feel very discombobulated!“—– I haven’t been keeping my promises.

For my entire life I’ve always given away my personal power, putting in the background my inner desires and wishes.  Leaving me with resentment and frustration and it’s happening again right now….Scattered thinking…out of balance…Tyranny of the urgent reigning supreme…….. but…there’s a silver lining in all this distraction. As this week lesson says in sentence 4, “The only way to keep from moving backward, is to move forward. Eternal vigilance is the price of success!”—–At least, now I see I have a choice and to add to that, I have this wonderful MKMMA plan to guide me, to bring me back to what’s REALLY important. I will not commit sins that my future self has to pay for. I am worth it!



MKMMA-Week 10

In the thick of it now…week 10 and all the novelty has worn off.  All the exercises and readings have now been done hundreds of times and the freshness is now something that must be created from within with every read, every sit, every recitation of my blue print and DMP.  Mark warned us in this weeks video. “Don’t perform the exercises like a laundry list. Engage with them.” It’s all a meditation. I must be present in each moment of each exercise….My mantra…Slow down…bring grace and skill to these moments of reading and recitation….. focusing on each word, hearing my voice, feeling my breath…..Feeling  the confidence and joy in my heart….I will persist and I will win.

During Trish’s read of this week’s lesson, she digressed and made a statement that I interpreted something like this: ” What is the pay off for your excuses you make to not be, not do, not create?”  Hit me like a ton of bricks….Then I thought…Addiction…as sad and sick as it sounds, addiction. addiction the the wrong chemicals that we get for our behaviors…Then I remembered what Mark had said in Lesson 4. Why do I keep doing the same things that get me  the same things and circumstances that I hate?—-bad drugs

It’s time to substitute good habits for bad ones.  Take the focus off me and give, give, GIVE!!!! to others…Give More, Get More…I’m in the flow!

After reading this weeks lesson the other night, I went to bed and I fell asleep. I had a dream that All of us in the alliances were forming a thought chain of harmony and love. A focused thought chain. Thought is energy, and 500 of us were all thinking the same thought. We were an unbroken circuit, we became one and a human dynamo. The thoughts went from one to the next and as the thought went from one of us to another, It gained strength and speed like a hurricane. All of sudden we were all magnificent and powerful,  the thoughts lifted each and all of us and we suddenly realized that we were powerful beyond measure, not afraid of our greatness. We began to send huge, loving thoughts into the pool of the world and huge waves touched all who were in its path. —It was so exciting it woke me up!—

the residue that is left over from that dream that stays with me, is how incredible it is to be a part of a group of 500 harmonious, like minded luminous beings.

NAMASTE…and Peace Be The Journey!